by Pat Severin

My heart is heavy, I’m bereft
With sorrow, Lord, consumed.
The anguish that comes over me
It smothers, as entombed.

I crave a breath, I gasp for air,
Will I survive or die?
This heavy pressure on my chest
It crushes, Lord, but why...

Was he so heartless, so unkind?
I’ve never witnessed such.
Was I so weakened I fell prey,
Succumbing to his touch?

And here is where I find myself,
I’m maimed, but now I see
That I was so in need of him
Or better yet, to be...

Loved by someone who loved like him,
But I, of course, was duped,
A simpleton who thought that he
Was capable of truth.

How foolish I must look to you,
How desperate to find love.
This was the ploy, and I the prey,
The perfect hand in glove.

He must have found my needy heart
The perfect one to fall,
And laughed as I surrendered there,
As I fell for it all.

I ask you, Lord, how could I be
So vulnerable as this?
Was I so starved for human touch
I’d melt with every kiss?

Relieved that it has ended now
Is what my heart should feel,
And yet my longing still remains;
My heart still ripe to steal.

I’m terrified that I might fall,
That’s why I come to you.
It worries me all day and night
What men might try to do.

If it’s the same, I’ll never know
Their lies from words of truth.
Please help me, Lord, I need you so,
For time flies by as youth.

I need to fill my heart with You, 
This memory must fade.
Help me to learn about myself
Forgive mistakes I’ve made.

Please guide me so that I don’t make
The same mistakes I’ve made.
I know, Lord, I can count on You;
I’m so glad that I prayed. Amen 

Pat Severin is retired Christian school teacher who has served her Lord in many ways. These include school, church and teen ministry and her current personal ministry, creating cards that include her original poems of encouragement. These she sends out weekly to those going through difficult medical issues. She contributes regularly to her online blog, Poetically Speaking, which she began in 2008, and has self-published a number of poetry collections.